Friday, September 28, 2012

Though your footprints were not seen... Psalm 77:19-20

Psalm 77:19-20
 "Your path led through the sea,
your way through the mighty waters,
though your footprints were not seen.
You led your people like a flock
by the hand of Moses and Aaron."

Lord I have been through the sea....and so many times I doubted that God was with me.  Deep valleys that I would find myself even digging deeper into a pit of despair.  Drowning in shame and guilt all of which I am not supposed to carry, especially if I truly believe that the word of God is true.  Now daily I have to live out God's truth like it truly is true!!

 For example Romans 8:1-2, "Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death."  I have been false advertisement for the work of Christ in my life; till recently.  So condemnation still seeps into my mind and I dispute the lie and claim the truth with prayer to the God who raises the dead to life, parts the waters, and directs my steps to help me no longer live in condemnation.

I look back on the struggles I have had; the scary times where I felt like David; that the waters were coming up to my neck (Psalm 69:1).  But now I can see that God held back the waters, parted the sea, all while my head was above water, for the purpose of leading me to a deeper relationship with Him. (To read the story of God parting the Red Sea through Moses look to Exodus 13 and 14)

Complete and beautiful dependence on God has brought joy and peace beyond anything that I have ever experienced.  Was I saved before?  Well I knew the truth of the word, but didn't believe it like I do now and there is no turning back.  Though I couldn't see God's footprints in my sea of depression, I know that the Lord Jesus Christ was there for me and he offers you the same thing.

Psalms 73:23-26, "Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand.  You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will take me into glory.  Whom have I in heaven but you?  And earth has nothing I desire besides you.  My flesh and my heart may fail. but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever."

Monday, September 17, 2012

The Story of my oldest- a Miracle

The desire to become a mother becomes stronger the longer you wait.  We had about 5 years of marriage prior to having the blessing of our first child, three years of which we strongly desired to start a family.  After testing from two different doctors; we started clomid.  Clomid sharply increases chances for multiples (ie twins).  At that season in my life it sounded great; 2 for 1.

So for two years we tried clomid along with provera (which starts your period), which ended with much frustration, and lots of tears.  Truly I wished Costco would have sold pregnancy tests by surplus, because I used so many in those years; and contributed to the landfill of Sonora, California at the time.  Well after some more testing I found out I had poly-cystic ovarian disease so the medication regime changed and glucophage (Metformin) was started.

More and more time went by and I waited for my cycle to come and it never did.  So on my MD's orders I was to take provera again starting in the morning.  I was struggling with depression at this time in my life so I am sure I went to bed around 8pm.

 I have always had crazy dreams (it is a family thing), vivid and memorable.   But this night I had a dream unlike any previous.  I dreamed that there was a tiny heart beat in my belly.  It was like I was looking right inside of me and saw that life was there.  So I woke early on that Sunday, with some skepticism, and took one of my running stock of pregnancy tests.

And sure enough it was positive, I waited the whole two minutes before I screamed at my husband that we were pregnant!!!  Being the person he is; he immediately got on the computer searching false positives on pregnancy tests on the Internet.  Love that man, but the moment was squelched.  So off to church we went and then we immediately left church, no fellowship was going to stop us, we were headed to the foothill pregnancy center were I worked at the time doing ultrasounds to confirm this "positive test."  So off we went and peered into the sacred place in my womb.  I coached Tyler on doing an ultrasound (definitely an interesting position for a husband and wife).  I will spare you the details.   But as clear as day; we saw a sac and our precious child's heart beat.

Well there is the miracle, did you catch it?  God gave me a dream that saved my precious child from me accidentally aborting him by taking the provera.  Had I taken the medication that the doctor prescribed it would have forced an abortion of our son.  God had this precious boy in mind before he was even conceived and God graciously protected him from us.  1 Samuel 1:27 , "I prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted me what I asked for."  So five years ago on September 22nd Noah Robert Danger Jefferson was born in a hurry and has been bustling with joy, energy, and love for life ever since.  We are so blessed to have him in our life.
Noah Jefferson 4 months

Sunday, September 16, 2012

A country drive and a Sunday Verse

Psalm 34: 8-10, "Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in him.  Fear the Lord, you his saints, for those who fear him lack nothing.  The lions may grow weak and hungry, but those who seek the Lord lack no good thing,"

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Water is Life and Health- Let's build a well

Dearest Readers-  I have just finished the best book, that I truly believe is a needed read by all people that profess to follow Jesus.  It's called The Hole in our Gospel by Richard Stearns. I have graciously received a challenge that has spurred my heart to not just believe in Christ but to act.  I believe we are saved by grace and out of that comes an evidence of that faith by our actions.  Its not that works bring about salvation!  But many times I have found one excuse or an other to ignore that voice from Christ that is whispering for me to be his hands and feet.

So as I finished the last pages of Stearns' book riding the exercise bike at 24 hour fitness, I heard that small quiet nudge "build a well."  Crazy I know, but the creator of the universe is that crazy .  So here I go (no no God goes) through world vision, inlue of any birthday gifts for this year and maybe the 40 some that follow I would love it if people joined together to help build a well in Africa.  Here is the link for more information: My Gift Catalog: My Gift Catalog

The link includes facts, a young ladies story, and an update on the ambitious goal.

 "You don't have enough faith," Jesus told them. "I tell you the truth, if you had faith even as small as a mustard seed, you could say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it would move. Nothing would be impossible."- Matthew 7:20 (NLT)

So may each of us pick up what faith we have; and together, each doing what we are able-- pick up a shovel and start moving mountains.  Here is a great video talking about sabina and her struggle for water for her and her family.

Monday, September 10, 2012

Monday verse

Psalm 16:7-8

" I will praise the Lord, who Counsels me; even at night my heart instructs me.

I have set the Lord always before me. Because he is at my right hand , I will not be shaken. "

Thursday, September 6, 2012

Far from the American Dream...My God is Greater

If our family goal was to live the "American Dream," we; as in my husband and I might be sorely disappointed.  I would define the American Dream by the words 'stability' and 'comfort'.  Financially we would be saving, knowing each bill was going to be paid off.  Instead, things are unpredictable to a point, but remember that God has always given us just enough.  

Our rainy day fund looks smaller and smaller.  Medically I have cost the family a small fortune with mental health, thyroid stuff,  MRSA, and now going to a new specialist.  I have been referred to an Immunologist, which I will see later today.  In addition to the costs we already have, my oldest is stuttering so much we started speech therapy twice a week.  All of these things deserve attention and are important; however it feels like it is too much!  And I believe that is exactly what Satan wants me to think.  

Such thought like "I don't deserve this!" and "life would be easier for my family without me," is a lie right from the pit of hell.  Look at Job in the Bible; he was considered righteous and yet God allowed Satan to take it all away.  When his wife told him to curse God, Job replied by saying "you are talking like a foolish woman.  Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble," (Job 2:10)  Earlier in the book Job, "got up and tore his robe and shaved his head.  Then he fell to the ground in worship and said: Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked I will depart.  The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised." (Job 1:20-21)  

As my pity party started, God graciously reminded me of his truth and then put a song of worship in my heart.  The words to this song are typed below; words that affirm the truth that God is greater, stronger, higher, healer, and awesome in power.  In his grace I believe that God will continue to raise me out of my ashes of despair, depression, and lack of faith.  I am praying for God's provision for my health, finances, and basic needs.  Only on Him can I trust because the American Dream is just that a dream... not reality for us and I would rather continue to look to God creator of the Universe for my daily bread and sustenance.

The "american dream" sounds great, but it can keep us from trusting our creator.  I thank the Lord that he loves me enough to remind of me of my need for Him.   

Psalm 147:5, "Great is our Lord and mighty in power; his understanding has no limit."

Philippians 4:19, "And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus."  -  Amen!

(Song: Our God is Greater by Chris Tomlin)

Water You turned into wineOpen the eyes of the blind
There's no one like You
None like You
Into the darkness 
You shine
Out of the ashes we rise
There's no one like You
None like You


Our God is greater, our God is stronger
God You are higher than any other
Our God is Healer, awesome and power
Our God, Our God... Into the darkness you shine
Out of the ashes we Rise
There's no One like You
None like You.Our God is greater, our God is stronger
God You are higher than any other
Our God is Healer, awesome and power
Our God, Our God... Our God is greater, our God is stronger
God You are higher than any other
Our God is Healer, awesome and power
Our God, Our God... [ Lyr
And if Our God is for us, then who could ever stop us
And if our God is with us, then what can stand against?
And if Our God is for us, then who could ever stop us
And if our God is with us, then what can stand against?
What can stand against?

Our God is greater, our God is stronger
God You are higher than any other
Our God is Healer, awesome and power
Our God, Our God... 

Our God is greater, our God is stronger
God You are higher than any other
Our God is Healer, awesome and power
Our God, Our God... (Repeat)

God's Majesty

Monday, September 3, 2012

Monday Verse: Job 19:25-27

"I know that my Redeemer
and that in the end he will
stand upon the earth.
And after my skin has been
yet in my flesh I will see
I myself will see him
with my own eyes- I, and
not another.
How my heart yearns with in me!"" -Job 19:25-27